Marital Matters

Personal stories about marital matters and separation issues.

November 16, 2012

sightseeing and beer drinking


Lesley's husband, Bob, didn't share her fascination for Germany, but he respected that was on a pilgrimage and was happy to go with her to Berlin and while she was sightseeing he could enjoy the local beers!

"For as long as I can remember Berlin had a wall - a dirty big structure separating East and West Berlin that was guarded by Checkpoint Charlie and had been the cause of many people perishing trying to get over it - and when it came down in 1989 I was knee deep in kids and deeply regretted I could not be part of this historical occasion," says Leslie, "so when Bob and I had some long awaited freedom I begged him to take a European trip with me."

"More than anything else," says Lesley, "I wanted to see that wall and what was on the other side of it and Bob finally relented on condition that he didn't have to come sightseeing with me - and while I would have preferred his company, I was prepared to do it alone."

"Bob's like this with shopping, too," sights Lesley. "It's almost as if he doesn't want to be seen in public with me!"

"Sometimes I think, why does he want to be married," sighs Leslie. "We mostly do things alone."

"Unfortunately, by the time I arrived in Berlin not a trace of the wall remained," laughs Leslie, "but when I got home I realized that I had been in the wrong part of Berlin."

"Anyway, I wasn't interested in souveniring a piece of the wall," explains Lesley, "I just wanted to see where it had stood and I was bitterly disappointed to find that every piece of that wall had been obliterated. It was as if the Germans didn't want to admit it had been there at all."

"Hadrian's wall is still standing in England," laughs Lesley, "and it's centuries old. Why couldn't they have left part of the Berlin wall standing for historical purposes?"

Despite the elapse of many years since 1989, Lesley was pleasantly surprised to see that East Berlin was as austere as she had imagined it to be.

It had remained relatively unchanged by the union and she could not believe that only a couple of miles away was the bright lights and commercialization of West Berlin.

"The department stores of East Berlin - if you can call them that - had hardly any merchandise," says Lesley. "The coffee shops were like sterile surgeries. The streets were devoid of people. The place looked deserted. Where was everyone?"


Did they all desert to West Berlin?

No, apparently they were all in the cake shop!

The one and only bustling area of East Berlin that Lesley could find was a huge cake shop that had every imaginable fattening thing on its shelves.

"Yes," laughs Lesley, "it had the usual apple pastries but also some gorgeous looking and probably heavenly tasting gateaux."

Lesley resisted.

In her broken German she asked about the wall. The lady at the cake shop gesticulated a bit, shrugged her shoulders, and apparently didn't want to talk about it.

Lesley was going to suggest to the lady that she could do a brisk trade selling Wall Cakes to tourists, but she thought better of it.

"Germans are not noted for their sense of humor," says Lesley, "and besides which I didn't know quite how to phrase the sentence in German."

Another bustling area was the underground railway, and surprisingly it was incredibly modern and clean.

"There were Gypsy beggars at the stations," says Lesley, "but no more than you see in London or any other large European city. There was one young girl, though, that actually accosted me demanding money and when I stepped back in fright the girl laughed and mocked: Oooh, la, la, la."

"The beggar girl probably thought I was French," muses Lesley. "She was mistaken."

After a quick stroll through the Brandenburg Gate and along the boulevard where stood many of the buildings where Hitler's operations were orchestrated, it was soon time for Lesley to return to the hotel and catch up with Bob.

"We were only in Berlin for a day," explains Lesley, "but it was plenty of time for me to go look at the wall that no longer exists!"

Flying on to Heathrow that night, the pilot welcomed his passengers to tropical London where the temperature was 9 degrees C.

So focused was Lesley on finding the wall and exploring East Berlin that she didn't even notice how cold it was. It had been -6 degrees C in Berlin.

"No wonder nobody was out and about," laughs Lesley. "And no wonder Bob propped up the bar at the hotel rather than getting out!"

"We had no choice but to travel in winter," explains Lesley, "but as far as a big trip is concerned it is definitely the best time of the year to travel."

"We had no trouble finding accommodation or getting flights here and there at a moment's notice."

"All told," says Lesley, "we were away for six weeks and of all the places we visited I will always remember Berlin as the highlight of my sightseeing - and Bob remembers German beer with fond memories, too!"

"If nothing else it was amazing to walk under the Brandenburg Gate and imagine all the historical figures who had been there, too," says Lesley."It was like going back in history and being there when all those terrible things happened in Germany."


"I did a lot of sightseeing and Bob did a lot of beer drinking," sighs Lesley. "If this is marriage then I guess it works for us."