Marital Matters

Personal stories about marital matters and separation issues.

November 18, 2012

married to a hunk!


Cheri has been married to a 'hunk' for two years, she runs a successful financial services business and is supporting her husband, Brad, through college . She is highly ambitious and status conscious and believes that if you haven’t made it by the time you’re 30, you’re a loser.

"After 30," sighs Cheri, "a woman doesn’t get as many chances in life. I’m making the most of my youth while I can. I’m definitely not looking forward to getting older."

Cheri worked in her profession for five years before striking out on her own - taking most of her former employer’s clients with her.

Asked whether that was a breach of business ethics, Cheri shrugged.

"The clients made the decision to follow me," explains Cheri, "I didn’t point a gun at them!"

Asked whether she would have started up on her own without those clients, Cheri paused before replying sweetly: "Yes, I would have, because I knew I was good."

While she was an executive manager for her former employer, it is true that Cheri was already bathed in the sweet aroma of success. It has doubled in potency since she started on her own.

At 28, Cheri is amazing. Everything she touches thrives. She says to everyone that the best way to get along and get ahead with her is to do everything in your power to remove the rocks in her path and make the trip to the top of the mountain nice and easy for her. Cheri laughingly admits that you won't be able to do much about the rocks in her head, but that's her problem, not yours.

Cheri does not work very hard at all. She is simply an incredibly adventurous and calculated risk taker. She admits to going where lesser mortals fear to tread and goes there in style, too. Cheri maintains that riches attract riches and in starting out in business she went for opulence, even though it was purchased with loans.

Asked about her astronomical debts, Cheri laughs.

"Should I ever get into trouble - which won’t happen," explains Cheri, "I am more likely to file for bankruptcy - after stashing away my assets in a Swiss bank - than pay the debts. I'm a financial adviser, remember?"

Cheri is a shining star in the business world and aims to expand her financial services company. She is usually very generous. She loves to spend money and she loves to show off. She has a retinue of people around her at all times, but most of them are hangers-on.

"If I didn’t have lesser mortals sniffing around me," laughs Cheri, "I would not be seen as a success. The hangers-on reinforce my power."

Everyone remarks about Cheri that she has a delicious sense of humor and a delightfully whimsical turn of phrase. You will be lucky to get a straight answer from her, one way or another, and even when she scowls she is inwardly brimming with mirth.

She admits to saying one thing, then another, and leaving people never knowing exactly where they stand with her. She is by no means indecisive, she is merely obfuscating, hiding her real intentions, which is why she is such a brilliant businesswoman.

Cheri advises never to try pulling wool over her eyes because she will always be one step ahead of you. She is an amazingly intuitive communicator. She watches your body language and appears to be able to read your mind.

Being upwardly mobile in every respect, Cheri needs everyone in her inner circle to exude wealth, breeding or accomplishment.

"When hiring staff," explains Cheri, "I am far more interested in talent, accomplishment and the capacity to work hard than what a person looks like. But when it comes to romance, I place good looks above all else!"

Her husband, Brad, is 5 years younger than Cheri and a real hunk.

"My emphasis on good looks in men does not mean I am shallow," explains Cheri. "I am very stable in relationships and I take my commitment to Brad seriously. I take care of him very well. He does not mind that I’m in charge. That’s the way he likes things to be."

Work is not on Cheri’s agenda at all. She is having fun. Pleasure is far more important to her than anything else. She, does, however, hire very capable people to do what needs to be done - at work and at home.

Because Cheri spends a great deal of her time on business trips, she has a housekeeper to look after everything at home. People enjoy working for Cheri because she is generous with pay and gives them responsibility.

"I give my staff no direction," explains Cheri, "because I expect people to take charge over whatever job I give them. I’m never there to give direction in any case!"

Cheri, like all high-flying businesswomen, is out there busy wining and dining clients, jetting off here there and everywhere and spending, spending, spending on whatever takes her fancy.

If business is all about relationships, then Cheri knows how to wheel and deal and charm the pants off anybody. She knows women who literally sleep their way to the top.

"There's nothing wrong with that," says Cheri. "If you’ve got it, flaunt it. Like I said, after 30 a woman’s prospects are virtually zilch."

Cheri is particularly versatile in business and has several irons in the fire. While ostensibly running a financial services company, it is, in fact, a front for a myriad of other businesses. Cheri is a diversifier and if another economic storm hits she'll ride it with ease.

"There's another thing you need to know," says Cheri. "I'm a dangerous person to cross. A former employee quit for no good reason, leaving me without adequate time to find a replacement, and I pulled a lot of strings to ensure that she'll have a hard time finding another job."

Despite the fact that Cheri ratted on her former employer, she considers herself to be a very loyal, ethical and committed person and expects her friends and employees to be likewise.

Woe betide Cheri’s husband if he ever wants out of the marriage!