Marital Matters

Personal stories about marital matters and separation issues.

November 23, 2012

what will the neighbours think?

Bridget lives in a very quiet and respectable area with her husband and four children – where the only human noise may be a crying baby or kids playing – so when she went crazy one night, and attacked her husband, her first thought immediately after her tirade was to worry about what the neighbors thought.

“For the first time in my marriage I turned on my husband in anger and said things to him that I will regret for the rest of my life,” says Bridget. “I made such a terrible noise that the neighbors thought my husband must be killing me – instead of the reverse - and they knocked on the door to see if I was alright.”

“My marriage survived the argument,” sighs Bridget, “but after the foul words that came out of my mouth I realized that I could never hold my head up high again in the neighborhood.”

“It all started when my husband expressed disdain for the law course I was doing – and the dreams I’d had since childhood about being a lawyer – and when he tossed my books and papers off the table a terrible rage took hold of me.”

“Those law books and my essay papers were me, an extension of my ego,” explains Bridget, “and I didn’t just wail in frustration like a 1-year old child, I vented a deep well of pent-up anger and frustration that I never knew I was capable of having.”

“Ironically, there I was striving for tangible rewards of my worthiness, wanting to prove to the world that I was clever, and hold my head up high in the neighborhood,” sighs Bridget, “and that night when I went crazy I lost everyone’s respect, but most of all my self-respect."

“I hate it when my neighbors stare at me strangely – imagining I am liable to go berserk again any day soon,” sighs Bridget. “Ultimately, I suppose we will have to move and uproot the kids from school.”

Read more about Bridget:

  • stations in life
  • dreams vs. husband
  • held back by family